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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22795069">Around</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SneetchesToo/pseuds/SneetchesToo'>SneetchesToo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Nightfall [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cancer, F/M, Flirting, Pre-Relationship, friends before lovers, not so secret anymore</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 18:13:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,352</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22795069</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SneetchesToo/pseuds/SneetchesToo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“I'm going home because it's late and I'm tired, but…” She stepped forward again, stopping when their knees bumped, “if you need someone to talk too…”</p><p>He shook his head again and she huffed.</p><p>“Fine, someone to not talk too,” This was not how she wanted this conversation to go but she honestly didn't know what else to expect, “I'll be around.”</p><p>“Around?” He seemed curious and she hoped maybe he would take her up on her offer.</p><p>“Around.” She shrugged her shoulders and offered him a soft smile. “Just call me. Or text. I'll be… around…”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Owen Strand and Michelle Blake, Owen Strand/Michelle Blake</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Nightfall [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1638826</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>88</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>74</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Michelle knew something was up the second she didn't see a drink in Owen’s hand Thursday night.</p>
<p>It was unlike him to not at least be sipping a beer.</p>
<p>Or even doing a few shots.</p>
<p>But Thursday night he had cradled a water in his hands.</p>
<p>A water, that Michelle noted, he barely touched.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>Then on Saturday she caught him red handed with a bag of McDonald’s fries.</p>
<p>She had never, not in two months, seen the man even go near a McDonald’s.</p>
<p>And he certainly never ate anything from there.</p>
<p>And yet, he had scarfed down the greasy fries when he thought no one was looking.</p>
<p>She had been helpless but to watch with an opened mouth stare as she stared at him from her Jeep.</p>
<p>She prayed he wouldn't realize it was her and freak out.</p>
<p>But he never did and he had thrown the bag away and snuck back into the firehouse like it was no big deal.</p>
<p>Except it was a big deal.</p>
<p>And Michelle was determined to get to the bottom of it.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>Then, to add to everything else that was strange about Owen’s behavior, she caught him dry heaving behind the building at a scene on Monday.</p>
<p>She was certain that he thought he was alone.</p>
<p>But she had seen him run off, his face as pale as a ghost, and she knew she had to follow.</p>
<p>He had brushed her off and blamed it on bad sushi but she knew better.</p>
<p>She knew something was up and her mind was reeling.</p>
<p>She didn't know why she cared so much, but she did.</p>
<p>And she was going to find a way to help him through whatever it was the best she could.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>The final straw had been catching him nodding off in his office chair on Thursday night. </p>
<p>It was late, probably close to three or four in the morning, so they were all pretty exhausted.</p>
<p>But this was a new kind of exhausted for him and she could tell.</p>
<p>She had stood in the shadows and watched for a minute, curious to see if anyone else would catch him in the act.</p>
<p>But no one did.</p>
<p>Instead he jolted awake at the sound of his phone buzzing and she watched as he tried to get his bearings.</p>
<p>He struggled for a minute, almost like he had forgotten where he was, and that's when she knew that whatever this was, it was much deeper than she had originally thought.</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>She waited another week before she confronted him, her nerves and their busy schedules getting in her way.</p>
<p>But she couldn't wait any longer.</p>
<p>Especially not when her mind had gone to a scary place in regards to what could be bothering him.</p>
<p>So she had waited for the firehouse to be rather empty, most of the team having gone home for the first time in three days.</p>
<p>And then she had approached him.</p>
<p>With bated breath and a heavy heart and slightly trembling hands.</p>
<p>“Hey.” She knocked on the outside of his door as she stopped at the threshold and waited. “Got a minute?”</p>
<p>“For you,” He pushed himself back from his desk slightly, his lips curling upward a little when he saw her, “I've got two.”</p>
<p>She nodded her head as she took a deep breath, crossing into the small room as she shut the door behind her.</p>
<p>“Uh oh.” His face fell slightly and he froze in his spot as she let the door click behind her. “Shutting the door is never a good sign.”</p>
<p>“We need to talk.” She didn't know why she used those words like that because she hated them, but that was the only way she could think to address this.</p>
<p>She knew he would shut her out and run away.</p>
<p>But she didn't want that.</p>
<p>She wanted to talk.</p>
<p>“Those words are never a sign of good things to come.” He leaned back in his chair as she took her own seat, her hands twisting together nervously as she tried to gather her thoughts.</p>
<p>“I'm on to you.” She whispered, her head raising upward so that she could lock her eyes with his. </p>
<p>“On to me?” He raised an eyebrow as he eyed her suspiciously, his hands gesturing toward himself in a ‘who me?’ manner. “What did I do?”</p>
<p>She shook her head at him as she let out a sigh.</p>
<p>He was gonna make her say it wasn't he?</p>
<p>“You know Owen…” She had never really used his first name before, at least not like this, and it felt almost intimate.</p>
<p>It was a feeling she both loved and hated.</p>
<p>“No, Michelle,” He dragged out her first name in a slightly annoying tone and she closed her eyes, “I don't know.”</p>
<p>“I don't wanna be the one to say it.” She really, really didn't want to be the one to say the word first.</p>
<p>It made her want to vomit just thinking about it.</p>
<p>“What are you talking about?” He looked genuinely confused and she didn't understand how someone so smart and so handsome could be so, dumb.</p>
<p>“It's cancer isn't it?” That godforsaken word had left her lips and she felt like she was going to be sick.</p>
<p>She watched as his eyes closed and he leaned back in his chair with an exhale.</p>
<p>“Don't lie to me.” She didn't know where she got off being so demanding, it wasn't like she was his girlfriend or anything. “Tell me.”</p>
<p>“I don't wanna talk about it.” His voice was soft yet full of annoyance and she could hear the fear dripping from his words.</p>
<p>“Just tell me goddammit!” She didn't know where that had come from and judging by the slight jump from him, neither did Owen.</p>
<p>She let out a breath as she watched him stare at her.</p>
<p>She knew she looked like a fool.</p>
<p>She knew she sounded like a fool too.</p>
<p>But dammit if this city boy hadn't warmed his way into her heart and now she was hooked.</p>
<p>She needed to make sure he was going to be okay because she needed him.</p>
<p>Needed him as a friend, as a partner in the field, and, hopefully, one day, as something more.</p>
<p>“Please Owen, talk to me.” She tried to talk softly, to let her concern come through in a way that was less, crazy ex-girlfriendish and more, possibly future girlfriendish.</p>
<p>“Not now.” He looked worn out and while she knew that the shift he had just finished had been an exhausting one, she was willing to guess that her confrontation had been more of a blow.</p>
<p>“When?” She wasn't letting up on this.</p>
<p>Not now.</p>
<p>Not ever.</p>
<p>“I don't know.” He ran a hand through his hair and she gripped the arms of the chair to try and calm her nerves.</p>
<p>“Is it… ya know…?” She couldn't bring herself to say the word again.</p>
<p>“Yes.” That single word looked like it had just done him in and suddenly she just wanted to wrap him up in her arms and never let him go.</p>
<p>“Okay.” She pushed herself up onto shaky legs then and made her way around the desk, stopping beside his chair as he turned to face her. “I'm not gonna leave this alone.”</p>
<p>“I really wish you would.” He sounded like he didn't really mean it through and she recognized the signs of a man hiding behind his pride.</p>
<p>“Well I'm not.” She set her face in a stern look, her hands reaching out to grip is shoulders softly. “And we will talk about this.”</p>
<p>He shook his head as he pushed away from her and she sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.</p>
<p>“Don't be a child.” He pouted at her and she guessed that that look would've worked on another woman.</p>
<p>But she wasn't another woman and she wasn't falling for his bullshit.</p>
<p>“I'm going home because it's late and I'm tired, but…” She stepped forward again, stopping when their knees bumped, “if you need someone to talk too…”</p>
<p>He shook his head again and she huffed.</p>
<p>“Fine, someone to not talk too,” This was not how she wanted this conversation to go but she honestly didn't know what else to expect, “I'll be around.”</p>
<p>“Around?” He seemed curious and she hoped maybe he would take her up on her offer.</p>
<p>“Around.” She shrugged her shoulders and offered him a soft smile. “Just call me. Or text. I'll be… around…”</p>
<p>“I think I'll be okay.” He didn't sound so certain though and she just sighed.</p>
<p>“Okay, well…” She leaned down then and pressed a feather light kiss to the top of his head.</p>
<p>And then she turned and walked out without another word.</p>
<p>The ball was in his court now and all she could do was wait.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*Here we go again! I've got several more ideas working for this story and I'm loving these two together so I promise there's more to come!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Owen was frustrated.</p>
<p>No, scratch that, he was infuriated.</p>
<p>Things hadn’t gone as planned with “Texas” and now he was in deep shit.</p>
<p>Deeper shit than he could’ve imagined.</p>
<p>He should’ve listened to Michelle.</p>
<p>Should’ve taken her advice when she said he was shady.</p>
<p>Because if there was ever a word to describe that asshole, shady was it.</p>
<p>“You’re still playing that silly game?” The sound of her voice made him stop in his tracks and he let the bottom of the putter hit the floor as he let out a sigh.</p>
<p>“I’ve taken a few breaks.” He hissed out.</p>
<p>He shouldn’t be taking this out on her.</p>
<p>It wasn’t her fault that her ex-whatever was a douchebag.</p>
<p>She tried to warn him after all.</p>
<p>“I would hope so.” He could hear the humor in her voice and he bet she was giving him that cocky little side smile she always did that made his heart do that weird flip-flop thing. “It’s been three days you know?”</p>
<p>He wondered if he ignored her if she’d leave him alone.</p>
<p>“Yes, well…” He didn’t really have a good enough answer so he just left it at that as he picked the putter back up and lined it up with his ball.</p>
<p>“You’re avoiding me.” She had moved closer now, he could tell by the softness of her voice and the way the air around him suddenly got a little warmer, and a little safer feeling.</p>
<p>“Not true.” He pointed a finger behind him as he did his best to concentrate on his putt. “You’ve been incommunicado.”</p>
<p>“Wow, what a big word Captain.” He hated when she picked on him when she was trying to distract him.</p>
<p>She knew it would work.</p>
<p>“I’ve read a few books in my time.” He let his left hand fall back to the club and took the putt, the ball rolling off the green within two feet, making it’s way under the chair.</p>
<p>“The Hardy Boys? Huckleberry Finn?” She was attempting to move into his line of sight and he hated it.</p>
<p>He really wanted her to go away so that he could sulk in peace.</p>
<p>“Yep.” He reached down and grabbed another ball, placing it on the tee and lining up his shot. “Just finished Tom Sawyer last week actually.”</p>
<p>Two could play at this game.</p>
<p>But she apparently had other ideas because she let out a sigh and then he heard her walking away.</p>
<p>He waited for her to shut the door and maybe come at him again like she had a week ago.</p>
<p>He would be lying if he didn’t think that her getting all frustrated and emotional with him hadn’t been a bit of a turn on.</p>
<p>When he turned around he was surprised to see that she was nowhere in sight and he let out a huff.</p>
<p>He was really hoping that she would stick around and pester him some more.</p>
<p>Especially when his brain was in overdrive and he needed someone to talk too.</p>
<p>But alas, he was left alone.</p>
<p>And he hated it.</p>
<p>—</p>
<p>That night the team had gone out for drinks to celebrate Mateo passing his exam and he wasn’t willing to admit how nervous he was.</p>
<p>He really didn’t want to run into her.</p>
<p>Not after the awkwardness from how earlier had gone.</p>
<p>No, instead, he wanted to get entirely too drunk, maybe call Zoe for a quick hook-up, and then sleep the next 24 hours away.</p>
<p>But none of that was going to happen if she was there.</p>
<p>“Wow, drinking tonight I see?” Her voice came out of nowhere, as did the hand she placed against his hip, and he froze with the beer halfway to his lips. “Special occasion?”</p>
<p>“Yep.” He nodded his head before bringing the bottle the rest of the way up and he watched as she stopped directly in front of him, mere inches left between them.</p>
<p>“You sure you’re feeling up to it?” He didn’t know if she was questioning him because of his health or because of his attitude earlier but either way, he wasn’t sure if he liked it or not.</p>
<p>“I’m feeling just fine thank you.” He watched as she shook her head softly, her hair sweeping over her shoulders just enough to make him blink back a strange feeling in his gut.</p>
<p>Was he really getting turned on by just that?</p>
<p>Because if that was the case, than he was going to need to make some serious life changes tonight.</p>
<p>“I heard about what Billy did.” She was almost whispering and he was actually thankful for that.</p>
<p>The last thing he needed was his team knowing that he could possibly lose his job.</p>
<p>“I don’t wanna talk about it.” He hissed out, downing the rest of his beer as he scooted back on his stool.</p>
<p>He needed to put some space between them ASAP.</p>
<p>“You never wanna talk about things.” She sounded more disappointed than anything else and he couldn’t figure out why.</p>
<p>It was his life that was falling apart, not hers.</p>
<p>“Just not the time.” They were in a crowded bar surrounded by their closest friends after all. “Or the place.”</p>
<p>“Then let’s leave?” Was she really asking him to leave the bar with her right now?</p>
<p>Because he knew how that would look to the others.</p>
<p>Especially TK.</p>
<p>Most definitely TK.</p>
<p>“I can’t.” He stood up from his spot then, stepping around her as he made his way toward the bar for another beer. “I’m here to celebrate.”</p>
<p>“You’re really gonna do this?” She huffed out her question as she placed her hands on her hips and by God if he wasn’t about ready to throw her over his shoulder and hightail his ass out of there with one destination in mind.</p>
<p>“Now’s not the time Captain Blake.” He growled out his warning just as TK and Judd appeared at the bar beside him.</p>
<p>She let out a huff and then turned on her heel and headed toward the other side of the bar.</p>
<p>He shook his head, taking the beer he was handed without a second thought, downing a third of it within seconds.</p>
<p>“Trouble in paradise?” Judd raised an eyebrow at him as he tipped his glass in the direction Michelle had disappeared in.</p>
<p>“There’s no paradise here.” And then he too turned on his heel and headed in the opposite direction.</p>
<p>This night was most certainly not going as planned.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*Don't forget to comment!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*I’m pretty sure that like no one is still reading this and it makes me sad. But I’m hopelessly addicted to them and so I think I’m probably writing more for me than anyone else right now. Anyway, if there is anyone still keeping up, I hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Michelle was certain that Owen Strand was going to be the death of her.</p>
<p>She had said it since day one and she was saying it now.</p>
<p>He was going to drive her over the edge and not in a good way.</p>
<p>Not in a way that involved little to no clothing and passionate kissing and no sleep.</p>
<p>No, rather, he was going to drive her over the edge by dragging her further and further into his web of pitifulness and self-destruction.</p>
<p>She felt drawn to him, like a moth to a flame, and she was helpless to control it.</p>
<p>She wanted to help him, to fix him, to get him through this.</p>
<p>But he pushed at every sign of affection she gave him and anytime she showed the least amount of concern for him he ran.</p>
<p>He avoided her at all costs and she hated it.</p>
<p>“Penny for your thoughts.” Owen’s voice echoing through the small space shocked her and she dropped her pen, her eyes snapping up to the open door of her office as she watched him just waltz on in.</p>
<p>“You don’t wanna know my thoughts Captain Strand.” She growled out her response and when he simply shrugged before shutting the door behind him she huffed.</p>
<p>Why was he allowed to be grumpy and snippy all the time but not her?</p>
<p>“Are they about me?” He should’ve already known the answer to that question and yet, here he was, asking it. “Because if they’re dirty thoughts, you might wanna save them until you’re somewhere more private.”</p>
<p>She rolled her eyes at his assumption that she would ever think of him that way.</p>
<p>“Can I help you or did you just come here to annoy me?” She leaned back in her chair as he stopped in front of her desk.</p>
<p>As much as she wanted to be with him and all, right now was not the best time.</p>
<p>“I actually came to make sure you were okay.” The genuine concern in his words made her heart skip a beat and she felt something inside her relax a little.</p>
<p>“I’m fine.” She tried to answer as gently as possibly, not wanting to scare him away just yet. “How are you?”</p>
<p>“Nuh uh.” He shook his head as he plopped down into the chair across from her, his hands going to the railings as he gave her a pointed look. “I’m here about you,” He nodded in her direction and she sighed, “not me.”</p>
<p>“Well can’t we talk about you instead?” She really didn’t want to be the first one in this relationship to open up.</p>
<p>She had a hard enough time talking to the people she was close with, much less someone she didn’t even know.</p>
<p>She supposed that made her a bit of a hypocrite considering she was asking him to do the same thing with her.</p>
<p>“Maybe later.” He sounded serious about his answer and all she could do was nod her head. “Now, your sister. I heard you got a tip earlier.”</p>
<p>She was really hoping that wasn’t where he was going with this.</p>
<p>“It was no good.” The tip had been a dead end and at this point she thought someone was just playing her.</p>
<p>These random tips coming in, none of them turning up anything good, they had to be a hoax.</p>
<p>“Nothing at all?” He sounded genuinely interested and concerned and she leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes for a second.</p>
<p>“I don’t wanna do this here?” She knew she should’ve gone home when her shift had ended two hours ago. “Please. I don’t wanna talk about it.”</p>
<p>“Then let’s get out of here.” He rose from his chair and gestured toward the door.</p>
<p>“What?” She couldn’t believe he was offering to leave, with her, at the same time, with the potential to talk about things after they left. “Who are you and what have you done with Owen Strand?”</p>
<p>“I’m a pod person.” He smiled as he spoke and she instantly felt a hundred times better about the situation she had somehow gotten herself into. “Come on, lets go.”</p>
<p>She rose from her chair just as a blonde woman rounded the corner and she watched as the other woman searched the floor for a second before stopping her eyes on Owen.</p>
<p>“Owen!” The woman’s voice grated her every fiber and she instantly knew this wouldn’t end well.</p>
<p>“Zoe?” He was grinding his teeth as he dragged out her name and Michelle guessed that he wasn’t expecting her visit either. “What are you doing here?”</p>
<p>“I thought I would come by and see you in action!” In action? What was he, Superman? </p>
<p>“It’s 11:30 at night.” He shifted his gaze toward her and she sank back into her chair.</p>
<p>She knew for a fact that they weren’t going anywhere together now.</p>
<p>“I was free…” This Zoe chick sounded more and more annoying with every word that left her mouth and she wondered what Owen saw in her. “I figured we could hook up. Maybe grab a bite to eat?”</p>
<p>And that’s when it hit her.</p>
<p>Zoe wasn’t just visiting Owen at the fire station.</p>
<p>She was “visiting” Owen at the fire station.</p>
<p>She was probably hoping for nice little romp in the proverbial hay on top of a fire truck or something.</p>
<p>The simple thought disgusted her.</p>
<p>“It’s late Zoe.” He sounded like he wanted to be anywhere but with her.</p>
<p>“No it’s not!” She reached out and grabbed his hand, practically dragging him out of her office. “Let’s go! There’s a new Vegan taco truck we should try. They’re open until two in the morning!”</p>
<p>The look Owen shot her way was begging for her to jump in, to help him out somehow.</p>
<p>But she wasn’t going to rescue him from this one.</p>
<p>Nope.</p>
<p>He had a lady friend that he apparently wasn’t going to tell her about and if that was how this was going to go, than fine.</p>
<p>“Have fun Captain Strand.” She picked up her phone and made quick work of dialing a number that she knew by heart, praying that Carlos was too busy to answer. “See you tomorrow!”</p>
<p>But Carlos did answer so she started making small talk about getting ready to leave work and that she’d bring dinner home and to save her a kiss goodnight and all the stupid, mushy shit she could think of.</p>
<p>“See, even your friend says it’s fine.” And then they were gone, Zoe’s hand still tugging on Owen’s tightly, a look of pure dread on his face as he blindly followed her.</p>
<p>If this was the game he wanted to play then fine.</p>
<p>Zoe could have him.</p>
<p>She didn’t need him anyway.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*I’m not sure if anyone’s out there but here’s a new chapter for you if you are!<br/>**P.S.: There’s a surprise at the end ;)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Owen was exhausted, as exhausted as could be, and the last thing he wanted to do was stay late at the firehouse and fill out paperwork.</p>
<p>Yet, here he was.</p>
<p>11:00pm on a Friday night, signing his life away on documents that he probably should have read more closely but couldn’t bring himself to.</p>
<p>So instead he scribbled away, a sigh escaping his lips just as he heard a soft thud across from him.</p>
<p>When he looked up he was shocked to see Michelle sitting in the chair on the other side of the desk.</p>
<p>He figured she would’ve gone out with the others.</p>
<p>Had a few beers, maybe found a guy to take her home.</p>
<p>He shook his head at the thought and bit back a growl of frustration.</p>
<p>He didn’t know why that thought bothered him so much but it did.</p>
<p>“So who’s your girlfriend?” Her question caused him to jerk his head upward as he squinted at her.</p>
<p>“Excuse me?” He wasn’t sure where her line of questioning was going, but he had a feeling he wasn’t going to like it very much.</p>
<p>“Your girlfriend?” She crossed her arms over her chest as she set her face in a stern look. “The blonde bimbo that you left here with the other night.”</p>
<p>“First of all, she’s not my girlfriend.” He didn’t know what Zoe was to be honest, but she was far from his girlfriend. “Second of all, she’s not a bimbo.”</p>
<p>“Tomato, tomahto.” Michelle shrugged her shoulders as she spoke and he let out a sigh.</p>
<p>Did they really have to talk about Zoe right now?</p>
<p>His head was already in a wonky place.</p>
<p>“Are you… jealous?!” It sure did sound like she wasn’t happy about the other woman’s presence in his life.</p>
<p>He got that vibe the other night too.</p>
<p>“Whaaat?! No!” She looked seriously offended by his question and he wondered for a minute if maybe he had gotten it all wrong. “Are you insane?”</p>
<p>But her reaction in the end was totally on point and the blush that crept to her ears didn’t go unnoticed as he sat down his pen and leaned back in his chair.</p>
<p>“I mean, if it quacks like a duck…” He wasn’t trying to make her mad, but maybe getting under her skin would get her to open up to him some.</p>
<p>“I am not jealous of Bimbo Barbie!” Oh yeah, he had definitely hit a nerve.</p>
<p>“Would you stop calling her a Bimbo?” He really didn’t like that term, no matter how fitting it may have seemed.</p>
<p>“Are you two dating?” That was certainly not the next question he expected from her and he raised an eyebrow in her direction.</p>
<p>“Not exactly.” He really wished he knew why she was suddenly so interested in his relationships with other women.</p>
<p>“So you’re just sleeping together?” And so what if they were?</p>
<p>He was a grown man.</p>
<p>He could make his own decisions.</p>
<p>Not matter how stupid and ridiculous they were.</p>
<p>“We’re…” But she didn’t need to know that he thought they were a little stupid and ridiculous.</p>
<p>“Yes? No? There aren’t that many options for an answer here Owen.” The fire in her eyes told him all he needed to know.</p>
<p>She was turning green with envy and it was making something deep inside him bubble.</p>
<p>“We’ve had sex a few times.” Three times to be exact.</p>
<p>He didn’t count the first night.</p>
<p>Especially since they didn’t actually do anything.</p>
<p>Damn chemo and all.</p>
<p>“Were you safe?” He rolled his eyes at her question.</p>
<p>What business of hers was it if he used any form of protection?</p>
<p>“Excuse me?!” Unless maybe she was trying to gauge how he would be in the future. “Why is that any of your business?”</p>
<p>“I’m just curious.” If there even was a future for the two of them out there.</p>
<p>“About my sexual escapades?” He really shouldn’t call it that, but unfortunately, there it was.</p>
<p>“So you admit that they’re escapades?” Yeah, definitely shouldn’t have used that term.</p>
<p>“Shut up.” He picked his pen up and chucked it at, a huff leaving his lips when she laughed at his horrible throw.</p>
<p>“Well…” She sat forward in her chair and clasped her hands together and he feared where she was going with this.</p>
<p>“Well what?” But he asked anyway.</p>
<p>“There aren’t gonna be any other little Strand’s wandering around are there?” Yeah, he had definitely walked right into that one.</p>
<p>“Did you really just come here to pester me about what I may or may not be doing with Zoe?” But he wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of actually answering her, so he did his best to deflect.</p>
<p>“No, that's not why I came here?” Her face got serious again and he watched as she stood from her chair and moved to shut the door.</p>
<p>That was never, ever a good sign.</p>
<p>“Why then?” But he still couldn’t help himself from asking her why she was here bugging him again.</p>
<p>“To check on you.” She sounded genuinely concerned and for a minute he almost gave in to her.</p>
<p>Almost.</p>
<p>“Me? I'm fine.” But then he remembered that they were at the firehouse and there were still other people around and he couldn’t go down that rabbit hole.</p>
<p>Not now.</p>
<p>Maybe not ever.</p>
<p>“I can tell.” She huffed out her response as she moved toward him, leaning against the desk as she let her eyes wander over his body.</p>
<p>“Are you ever gonna leave me alone about this?” He honestly didn’t appreciate her concern.</p>
<p>But he couldn’t let her see that.</p>
<p>“No.” She cocked her head to the side and her hair did that fall over her shoulder thing and he had to look away before his mind went to that place again.</p>
<p>“Can I pay you to mind your own business?” He would gladly give her a decent amount of money to leave him the hell alone.</p>
<p>“I can't be bribed.” But apparently money wasn’t what she wanted.</p>
<p>“Well if money doesn't work there are other methods…” He turned back toward her and winked.</p>
<p>He would definitely go there if she was willing.</p>
<p>“Are you trying to bribe me with sex?” She sounded slightly offended and he watched as her eyes got wide and the blush started to creep back up her neck.</p>
<p>“Would it work?” He turned his whole body toward her then, watching as she took a step back.</p>
<p>“No…” He had struck a nerve somehow and he wanted to know more.</p>
<p>“You sound uncertain.” He really should stop pushing her, but he just couldn’t make himself walk away.</p>
<p>“Shut up.” But she had clearly had enough when she shot him a look that could surely kill.</p>
<p>“Look I appreciate the concern Captain Blake,” He really was thankful that she was checking up on him, “I really do, but I'm fine.”</p>
<p>“I can see right through your pile of lies, Captain Strand, and I know you’re full of shit.” She snapped at that moment and he held up his hands as she took a step toward him. “You're not fine, not by a long shot. I don't know why you won't talk about it, maybe you're too proud or maybe you’re scared, I don't know. But what I do know is that you can’t run from this and you can't hide, no matter how hard you try. And if you won't talk to me then I pray to God you'll at least talk to TK or your sex buddy or somebody because it's not good to keep it all in like this.”</p>
<p>“Thanks for the advice.” He felt his heart racing a million miles a minute at her words and he closed his eyes as he took a deep breath.</p>
<p>“Yeah, well, I don't know why you're pushing away someone who actually cares.” His eyes snapped open at her words and he pushed himself from his chair and toward her. “Let me guess, your little playmate doesn't know?”</p>
<p>“It's none of her business.” He snapped.</p>
<p>Zoe didn’t need to know about anything in his personal life.</p>
<p>Not his job.</p>
<p>Not his son.</p>
<p>And certainly not his fucking cancer.</p>
<p>“Just like it's none of mine?” She crossed her arms over her chest again and he was getting a feeling in his gut that was making it really hard to concentrate on her words and not on how sexy she looked getting all flustered with him.</p>
<p>“That's different.” He tried to calm himself down.</p>
<p>He tried to be gentle and understanding.</p>
<p>“Why?” But she just kept pushing.</p>
<p>“It just is.” It was different.</p>
<p>Very different.</p>
<p>And he didn’t really understand why.</p>
<p>“Because we're friends?” She raised an eyebrow at him and he huffed.</p>
<p>“Because we’re not.” He figured snapping would shut her up.</p>
<p>But the pained look that came across her face told him he had gone about this all wrong.</p>
<p>“Well damn.” Her voice was barely a whisper and he felt something inside him stir. “Low blow there Captain.”</p>
<p>Something inside him that said he should really just shut up right now.</p>
<p>“I didn't mean it like that.” He hadn’t meant to hurt her.</p>
<p>He really, really hadn’t.</p>
<p>But ever since he had gotten sick his ability to make his words make sense had gotten lost.</p>
<p>“Clearly…” She backed away from him, a tear escaping her eye as she did.</p>
<p>“Look, I'm sorry okay.” He reached for her but she swatted his arm.</p>
<p>“Yeah, whatever Owen, I'm done.” She started heading toward the door and he followed her.</p>
<p>“Hey!” He gently grabbed her hand then, stopping her in her tracks. “Don't go.”</p>
<p>“Why? I thought we weren't friends.” Her question was barely audible and he couldn’t stand how badly one little stupid comment had hurt her.</p>
<p>“Oh hush, you know that's not what I meant!” She had to have known that they were friends at this point.</p>
<p>Right?</p>
<p>Wasn’t it pretty obvious by now?</p>
<p>“Could've fooled me.” Her eyes closed as she let her head fall downward, a deep breath escaping her as she tried to pull her hand free once more.</p>
<p>“You never let me explain myself.” He stepped closer to her, his free hand going out to cup her cheek.</p>
<p>He heard her let out a shaky breath as he forced her head upward, their eyes locking as she did her best to shut him out.</p>
<p>“No explanation needed. You clearly don't want anything to do with me…” But he didn’t let her finish, instead, he slammed his lips against hers with a fire he didn’t know he possessed.</p>
<p>Sure, he had thought about kissing her before.</p>
<p>He had thought about doing many things with her before.</p>
<p>But now that he was actually doing it…</p>
<p>Well his whole body ignited the second his lips touched hers.</p>
<p>He pulled back after a few seconds, his eyes opening as he held her in place.</p>
<p>The blush that had once just been on her neck was now on her cheeks and it was probably the cutest damn sight he had ever seen.</p>
<p>“What was that for?” She whispered her question as she opened her eyes and he smiled at her softly.</p>
<p>He hoped that she wasn’t mad at him.</p>
<p>Because he had seen what she could do when she was mad.</p>
<p>And he never wanted to be on the receiving end of that.</p>
<p>“You wouldn't shut up.” He let his forehead fall to hers and she swallowed, her hand turning over in his as she tried to steady herself.</p>
<p>“So you kissed me?!” It did sound like a silly solution if you asked him.</p>
<p>“Well it worked didn't it?” But it had worked and it had gotten her to stop freaking out, so in the end, it was totally worth it.</p>
<p>“I… I should go.” She tried to back away but he tugged her close once more, his hand cupping her neck as he stared down at her.</p>
<p>“Oh come on, it wasn't that bad was it?!” He couldn’t imagine that the kiss was bad.</p>
<p>He had been told before that he was an incredible kisser.</p>
<p>And she certainly knew what she was doing, even it had just been a peck.</p>
<p>“I never said it was…” She blinked her eyes a few times and he could tell that she was uncertain of her words.</p>
<p>He could always tell when she was lying or not telling the whole truth.</p>
<p>“Wanna do it again?” He would have gladly stood there kissing her all night if it was up to him.</p>
<p>“Shut up Owen.” She rolled her eyes as she spoke but then her hand was tightening around his and there was a glint in her eye that said otherwise.</p>
<p>“Make me.” He wasn’t going to let her get away with this.</p>
<p>So instead he leaned in and kissed her once more, the feeling of her lips against his making his whole body relax instantly.</p>
<p>He wanted nothing more than to take her home with him right then and there.</p>
<p>But just as he pulled back and got ready to suggest that they do just that, her pager had gone off and she had been out the door without another word.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Michelle had been incredibly confused by Owen’s behavior the past days.</p>
<p>First he was pushing her away and ignoring her.</p>
<p>Then he was kissing her like his life depended on it.</p>
<p>She knew he was going through some stuff, but damn, he was confusing the hell out of her.</p>
<p>She had just gotten ready to settle down on the couch with a beer when she heard her doorbell ring.</p>
<p>Her doorbell never rang.</p>
<p>Her mom normally just let herself in and Carlos had this creepy secret knock that he did.</p>
<p>But neither of them ever rang her doorbell.</p>
<p>Letting out a sigh she made her way toward the door, opening it slowly.</p>
<p>She was shocked to see none other than Owen Strand standing on the other side, a pizza box in his hands as he smiled at her. </p>
<p>“Hey.” He sounded tired and she could see the slight bags under his eyes.</p>
<p>“Hi…” He was the last person she expected to see standing at her door.</p>
<p>“I brought pizza.” Especially when he had pizza.</p>
<p>“Pizza? I don't think I've ever seen you eat pizza.” He had eaten that greasy Chinese food that night at the hospital.</p>
<p>And she had seen him and Judd eating donuts the other morning.</p>
<p>But this was the first time she’d ever seen him touch a pizza.</p>
<p>“I had a bad day.” That would explain it though.</p>
<p>“In that case, come in.” She wouldn’t dare let him spend the night alone if he was feeling that kind of way.</p>
<p>So instead she stepped back and gestured toward the living room.</p>
<p>“Nice place.” She let the door shut behind him as she watched him take in the area around him.</p>
<p>“Thanks. I think.” She supposed that was a compliment but she wasn’t sure.</p>
<p>“You have nice taste.” He smiled at her as he set the pizza box down on the table and plopped down on her couch without a second thought.</p>
<p>“Most of this stuff is Iris’,” She had picked on her sister for the way she had decorated the place at first, but now, well now she appreciated the simplistic design, “she lived here first.” </p>
<p>“I'm sorry, I didn't…” He instantly looked guilty and she took a deep breath.</p>
<p>He had no way of knowing that and she hoped that she hadn’t made him feel too bad.</p>
<p>“It's fine. You couldn't have known.” She returned his earlier smile as she held her drink up. “Beer?”</p>
<p>“Ah I'm gonna pass tonight.” She nodded her head as he settled back against the cushions and opened the box in front of him.</p>
<p>“Not feeling so great?” So instead she grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and moved to join him.</p>
<p>“Headache.” He sounded like it was more than a headache but she wasn’t going to press him.</p>
<p>At least not yet anyway.</p>
<p>“Water it is then.” She handed him the cold bottle as she stopped beside him. “I've got Aspirin if you need some.”</p>
<p>“I'm okay right now. Thanks though.” He shoved a giant bite of pizza in his mouth, talking around it like a damn child. “I'm hoping the pizza will do the trick.”</p>
<p>“Then let's eat.” She sat down on the opposite end of the couch before reaching forward to grab a slice for herself. “You can change the channel if you want, it was really just on for background noise.”</p>
<p>“Nah it's good. Don't watch much TV anyway.” What was funny was that she kind of already suspected that. “Not unless baseball’s on.”</p>
<p>“Well I cant help you there. I don't know a thing about it.” What little she did know about the sport came from watching it with Carlos randomly. “I don’t even think I get a baseball channel.”</p>
<p>She imagined she must have though, because Carlos was a nut about the damn Astros, but she had no idea how to go about locating it on the TV line-up.</p>
<p>“You're missing out!” He pointed his pizza crust at her as he talked and she was reminded of a small child who hadn’t quite gotten down their table manners yet. “It's so much better than football.”</p>
<p>“Yeah… I don't really get into sports much.” She had never really cared much for sports of any kind.</p>
<p>Not for any particular reason other than she had never had a reason too.</p>
<p>“That's a shame.” He shrugged his shoulders before leaning forward and grabbing another slice of pizza.</p>
<p>She offered him a smile before leaning back against the cushions, taking another bite of her slice as she watched him for a minute.</p>
<p>He seemed relaxed enough but she could still tell that something was bothering him.</p>
<p>She wanted to pry, to ask a million and one questions, but she couldn’t bring herself to do.</p>
<p>So instead she stayed quiet and let him do his thing, her eyes shifting toward him every so often to make sure he was still there.</p>
<p>—</p>
<p>After they had finished their pizza she had moved the box into the kitchen before grabbing another beer and making her way back to the couch.</p>
<p>She contemplated sitting down next to him, but she wasn’t sure how that would be received.</p>
<p>So instead she returned to her spot at the end of the couch.</p>
<p>But then her leg started to cramp up a few minutes later and she was left with quite the dilemma.</p>
<p>Did she risk stretching her legs out and toward him, or did she let the cramp take over and suffer all night?</p>
<p>Deciding that suffering wasn’t a good enough option she turned her body sideways, letting her legs stretch out across the couch.</p>
<p>Her feet stopped right against his thigh but he didn’t even budge.</p>
<p>She wondered for a second if he was even still awake.</p>
<p>But then the next thing she knew he was pulling her feet into his lap with one hand, the other going to lay overtop of her legs.</p>
<p>“What are you doing?” She wasn’t entirely sure why he had started massaging her feet but she thought that was awfully nice of him.</p>
<p>Weird, but nice.</p>
<p>“Oh sorry.” He whispered, his hands stopping their motions as he rested them on top of her feet. “I can stop.”</p>
<p>“You don't have too!” She most certainly didn’t want him to stop! She couldn’t remember the last time someone had rubbed her feet like that. “I was just curious… feels kind of good actually.”</p>
<p>“I take it you don't relax much?” He let his head fall back against the couch as he turned it in her direction and she simply shook her head back and forth as she let her head fall to the couch as well.</p>
<p>“What's much?” Their eyes locked and she felt something inside her stir.</p>
<p>Something that she hadn’t felt in a long while and it scared her.</p>
<p>She shouldn’t be feeling feelings like this when it came to Owen Strand.</p>
<p>“Well, relax.” And yet, here he was, being the perfect gentleman and taking care of her.</p>
<p>She could tell that she was starting to doze off about fifteen minutes later when he stopped rubbing her feet.</p>
<p>But instead of letting go of them he simply kept them in his lap, his left arm draping itself across the top of her ankles.</p>
<p>His thumb found a spot on the outside of her left foot where her skin was exposed and she felt a shiver run through her body at the contact.</p>
<p>She could have easily let herself fall asleep right then and there, but unfortunately she couldn’t get him out of her mind.</p>
<p>So instead she decided that now was the best time to try and make him talk.</p>
<p>“So when are you gonna talk to me about it?” She asked the question softly, hoping not to scare him too much with her needs.</p>
<p>“About what?” He closed his eyes briefly before turning to face her once more.</p>
<p>“You know about what.” She gave him a soft smile, praying that maybe she could charm an answer out of him.</p>
<p>“Why do we have to talk about it?” He sounded like a small child and she shook her head as she kicked his thigh playfully. “Why can't we just accept it and move on?”</p>
<p>“Because that's not healthy.” And it wasn’t healthy.</p>
<p>He couldn’t act like the cancer didn’t exist.</p>
<p>Not anymore, not at this stage of his life.</p>
<p>“And talking is?” But she knew that talking about things like this was hard for him.</p>
<p>“You know it is.” She leaned forward then, taking his hand in hers as she scooted closer to him. “You know it's important to have a support system, friends, people to help take care of you.”</p>
<p>“I'm fine.” He whispered.</p>
<p>But she knew for a fact that he was anything but fine.</p>
<p>“You said today was a bad day. Chemo?” She knew that chemo was rough.</p>
<p>She knew that it could take a toll on a person’s body.</p>
<p>But she couldn’t imagine what he must be going through.</p>
<p>“This morning. Before shift.” His eyes looked tired and she felt her heart break for him.</p>
<p>She just wanted to wrap him up in her arms and never let him go.</p>
<p>“Have you been feeling nauseous?” He had mentioned to her a few times that that was the worst part of the whole thing some days.</p>
<p>“All day.” She squeezed his hand tightly, trying to offer as much support as she could. “Headache’s the worst it's ever been too.”</p>
<p>“You should be sleeping.” He should be at home resting at the very least.</p>
<p>Not sitting here with her.</p>
<p>“I had things to do.” The smile he offered her made her blush and she shook her head at him.</p>
<p>“Like come see me and eat pizza?” If she didn’t know any better she’d say he was flirting with her.</p>
<p>“Yes.” Yeah, definitely flirting.</p>
<p>“Well I'm glad you think so highly of me but your health is more important.” And it was true.</p>
<p>She was glad that he came to her, but he needed to take care of himself first.</p>
<p>“I'm fine. It’s just a headache.” He shook his head softly, his eyes closing once more, and she felt a tiny piece of her heart break at how fragile he looked.</p>
<p>Sighing to herself she dropped his hand and moved back to her spot at the other end of the couch.</p>
<p>And then she patted her lap and gave him a soft smile.</p>
<p>“Lay down.” She knew it was a long shot, but it was worth it.</p>
<p>“You've got to be kidding me?” He opened his eyes as he stared at her like a deer in the headlights.</p>
<p>“Do I look like I'm joking?” She tried to sound threatening but it came out more flirty than anything else and she watched as he chuckled softly. “Lay down.”</p>
<p>He raised an eyebrow at her and she just stared him down.</p>
<p>And it must have worked because a minute later he was laying down, his head falling to her lap as he settled on his side.</p>
<p>She let her hands fall to his head, first rubbing his temple and then through his hair and down his neck.</p>
<p>“This okay?” He certainly didn’t seem to mind it, but she just wanted to make sure.</p>
<p>“Yeah.” He whispered his response, his eyes closing as he relaxed a little bit more.</p>
<p>“Is it helping any?” She hoped it would at least relieve some of the tension in his head and back.</p>
<p>“It's relaxing.” He barely got the words out before his eyes started closing even more.</p>
<p>She could feel his body giving in to sleep but she kept massaging for a while longer.</p>
<p>Not only had it relaxed him, but now she was relaxed a little more too.</p>
<p>When she looked at the clock a little while later it was almost 11:00pm and she knew she needed to get to sleep.</p>
<p>She gently stood, laying his head down in her now empty spot before pulling the throw blanket over him.</p>
<p>She knew she should wake up and tell him to go home.</p>
<p>Or, at the very least, invite him to bed.</p>
<p>But she couldn’t get over how soft and peaceful he looked laying there and she didn’t want to disturb that.</p>
<p>So instead she pressed a kiss to his temple before turning the TV and surrounding lights off.</p>
<p>And then she headed to bed herself, her mind spending the whole night on the man sleeping down the hall.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Owen awoke with a start, his eyes instantly searching his surroundings as he tried to figure out where exactly he had passed out this time.</p>
<p>He knew he wasn’t at home.</p>
<p>And he knew he wasn’t at the firehouse.</p>
<p>But he didn’t remember going anywhere other than Michelle’s last night so he was confused.</p>
<p>But when he pushed himself up into a sitting position and let his eyes scan the area around him he instantly realized that he hadn’t gone far.</p>
<p>In fact, he was on Michelle’s couch and the clock on the end table read 2:01am.</p>
<p>Letting out a sigh he pushed himself into a standing position before making his way down the hall in search of a bathroom.</p>
<p>But just as he rose his pager went off and he let a string of curse words escape his mouth as he saw the 911 page to the station.</p>
<p>He was really hoping to just go back to sleep.</p>
<p>He continued down the hall in search of the bathroom and found one almost immediately and after taking care of his business he went in search of his next desired location.</p>
<p>Michelle’s room.</p>
<p>He figured that she would probably say something about him being in there, but he wanted to make sure that she was okay before he left.</p>
<p>Pushing the door open he saw her laying on her side, her back to the door, the window across from him open slightly as a light breeze blew through the room.</p>
<p>He made his way toward her and knelt down beside the bed, his hand reaching out to settle on her shoulder gently.</p>
<p>“Owen?” She whispered his name softly as she rolled onto her back and he offered her a soft smile.</p>
<p>She had to be the most beautiful thing he had ever seen with her hair a mess against the pillow and her eyes all soft and sleepy.</p>
<p>“I've gotta call.” He hated saying those words to her. “I didn't want you to worry.”</p>
<p>“Be safe.” She blinked a few times before offering him a soft smile in return.</p>
<p>“I will.” He leaned forward then and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead knowing damn well that he was probably crossing a line or two. “Text me when you're up.”</p>
<p>“Okay.” She offered him another sleepy smile before snuggling into the covers and he felt his heart ache.</p>
<p>All he wanted to do was crawl into bed with her and forget the world.</p>
<p>“Go back to sleep.” But he knew that wasn’t an option right now so instead he let out a soft sigh before squeezing her shoulder and standing.</p>
<p>And then he was slipping out the front door and into the dark of night like he was hiding a secret.</p>
<p>--</p>
<p>A secret that was surely going to get him in trouble if he didn’t start covering his tracks soon.</p>
<p>Because as soon as he got to the firehouse TK was on him like white on rice.</p>
<p>“You didn't come home last night.” He really wanted to add a sarcastic comment but he refrained. “Were you with your lady friend?”</p>
<p>“No.” Thank goodness he wasn’t with Zoe.</p>
<p>The sex may have been pretty decent, but he felt himself being drawn into Michelle in a way that he never thought possible.</p>
<p>A way that went beyond sex and beyond something physical.</p>
<p>It was certainly something that he hadn’t felt in a very long time.</p>
<p>“Where were you? You didn't sleep in your car again did you?” He had done that once, once, and the kid would never let him live it down.</p>
<p>“No.” He grabbed his things and started heading toward the floor when TK grabbed his arm and stopped him.</p>
<p>“Okay well you've run out of excuses now because I know you weren't here or with what's her face so…” He sounded like a panicked little kid and Owen couldn’t help but chuckle.</p>
<p>“I was at Michelle's.” He really shouldn’t have said anything because he was sure that she wouldn’t have wanted anyone to know.</p>
<p>“Captain Blake?” His eyes went wide as he stared him down. “Well damn…”</p>
<p>“It's not like that.” Yet, it wasn’t like that yet.</p>
<p>She might not have been into booty calls but he was certain that he was gonna win her over eventually.</p>
<p>“Riiiight.” TK seemed about as convinced as he was though.</p>
<p>He got ready to reply when the others started heading their way and he shot TK a look that he hopped he understood to mean ‘shut up’.</p>
<p>“Drop it.” He growled out as he walked by.</p>
<p>“We're not done talking about this Captain!” He rolled his eyes as he headed for the rig but he knew that he was right.</p>
<p>He wouldn’t leave him alone about this until he came clean.</p>
<p>--</p>
<p>But he never got the chance that day to come clean because it had been shit storm after shit storm.</p>
<p>And then Billy had called him and started carrying on and he had had about enough of the bullshit.</p>
<p>He had just let out a string of curses under his breath when Michelle rounded the corner and leaned against the door frame to his office.</p>
<p>She offered him a soft smile and he did his best to smile back as he growled out a ‘goodbye’ to the other man before slamming the phone down.</p>
<p>“Everything okay?” Her question was soft and he shut his eyes for a minute as he tried to gather his thoughts.</p>
<p>“Just your good friend Billy.” He growled out, his eyes opening as he leaned back in the chair.</p>
<p>“He giving you a hard time again?” She stepped across the threshold into his office and while he mostly appreciated her company, right now, he just wanted to be alone. </p>
<p>“That's an understatement.” The guy was going to be the death of him, one way or the other.</p>
<p>“I'd comfort you but it's not exactly private around here.” She was flirting and he knew it and yet he couldn’t bring himself to flirt back.</p>
<p>“It's okay.” Not right now.</p>
<p>Not with how badly his head hurt and his eyes burned and his stomach was churning.</p>
<p>“When's your shift up?” He wanted so badly to say ‘now’ and just disappear with her right then and there. <br/>“I can make dinner if you want.”</p>
<p>“Uh not for a while.” God a home cooked meal sounded great. “Probably pulling a 24 hour one here.”</p>
<p>“Tomorrow night then?” Especially a home cooked meal in her home.</p>
<p>“Probably not until Friday.” He hated that he’d have to wait three days thought. “I've got some stuff to take care of tomorrow.”</p>
<p>“Cancer stuff?” He really wished that she would stop bringing the fucking cancer thing up.</p>
<p>It was such a buzzkill.</p>
<p>“Billy stuff.” But it wasn’t cancer stuff.</p>
<p>No, instead he was training for that damn test.</p>
<p>“Ah. Need some help?” If only he could tell her about it.</p>
<p>“I think this might be something I have to do alone.” Although, in hindsight, she probably already knew.</p>
<p>Especially if the others knew.</p>
<p>“Not necessarily.” Her voice was soft and her eyes were giving off a vibe that said she just wanted to make him feel better.</p>
<p>“It's probably safer this way.” But he had to keep her at arm’s length right now.</p>
<p>“Well you know I'm a risk taker so…” It was what was for the best, right?</p>
<p>“I know how you feel about Billy.” He knew nothing about their relationship but he honestly didn’t need to.</p>
<p>Hell, he really didn’t want too.</p>
<p>“I don't think you know the half of it.” There was a fire in her voice that hadn’t been there thirty seconds ago and he knew he had crossed a line.</p>
<p>“I don't wanna fight right now.” And he didn’t, he just wanted to, be.</p>
<p>“We don't have too.” Apparently they were on the same page with that one at least. “Just let me in. Let me help.”</p>
<p>“Look, I'm doing this alone and that's final.” He hadn’t meant for there to be so much venom in his words but there was and he instantly regretted it.</p>
<p>“Fine.” Her face turned to stone and her eyes turned dark and cold and he knew he had gone too far.</p>
<p>And before he knew it she was storming out of the room just as quickly as she had appeared.</p>
<p>And he felt a twinge in his gut that had nothing to do with cancer.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*Here’s a longer chapter full of flirting and fluffiness and God I’m just in love with these two and there’s no way around that.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Michelle had been disappointed when Owen had turned down her dinner invite.</p>
<p>But she had been downright hurt with the way he had talked to her about the situation with Billy.</p>
<p>She knew something was up and that something was bothering him.</p>
<p>But he had no right to take it out on her.</p>
<p>Not when she was just trying to help.</p>
<p>So she had kept her distance the past day and a half and she had let him do whatever it was that he needed to do.</p>
<p>But then she ran into him as he and TK were leaving the station on Friday morning and she couldn’t help but speak up.</p>
<p>“Leaving for the day?” She figured he probably was heading home after having just finished an almost 48 hour shift.</p>
<p>“Nah. Just running an errand.” She watched as TK kept walking, his eyes shifting behind him every so often.</p>
<p>“Okay.” She didn’t know why this was so awkward.</p>
<p>They were co-workers, friends even.</p>
<p>She should have been able to handle having a conversation with him about absolutely nothing.</p>
<p>“I um…” He turned to leave and she let out a sigh.</p>
<p>She didn’t want him to go, not yet, not before she could invite him to dinner one last time.</p>
<p>“I should be out of here by 2:00 if you wanna come by.” She kind of just blurted it out and there it was and she crossed her fingers that it didn’t throw him off guard. “My invitation for a homemade dinner still stands.”</p>
<p>“I'll let you know.” He sounded unsure and it made something inside her twinge.</p>
<p>It really shouldn’t be like this with them should it?</p>
<p>It’s not like things between them were serious.</p>
<p>In fact, they weren’t anything at all.</p>
<p>“I mean it.” But she just wanted to get to know him and she wanted him to know that she was there for him.</p>
<p>“I know you do.” He offered her a soft smile though and she figured that was a step in the right direction.</p>
<p>“I'll let you go, I can see TK’s getting antsy.” She could see the younger man watching them, his eyebrows raising occasionally in their direction.</p>
<p>“You know he won't leave me alone about us.” She didn’t know what he meant by that but she didn’t doubt it.</p>
<p>TK was a little too nosy for his own good.</p>
<p>“Us? There isn't much to tell.” Was there?</p>
<p>“Will you tell him that because he won't shut up?” He was back to joking and flirting and it was like nothing ever happened.</p>
<p>She was both thankful and annoyed with that.</p>
<p>“He's concerned about you.” She knew that TK just wanted to know what was going on his dad’s life so that he could take care of him.</p>
<p>“He's a nosy little bastard is what he is.” She doubted that the kid was really that concerned with her though.</p>
<p>“He just loves his dad.” If there was anything she knew about Owen and TK’s relationship it’s that they were close and that they loved each other like crazy.</p>
<p>“Well he's getting on his dad's nerves right now.” He offered her a smile as he shot a look in the younger man’s direction and she let out a sigh.</p>
<p>“Do you want me to talk to him?” Not that she thought it would do any of them any good.</p>
<p>“No. As annoying as it is, I kinda like that he's left a little in the dark.” He turned back toward her and winked, a mischievous smile gracing his lips as he spoke. “My romantic life is not something he needs to know anything about.”</p>
<p>“So we’re romantic now huh?” That part was certainly news to her.</p>
<p>“You know what I mean.” He shrugged his shoulders as he let out a soft cough and she could see the blush forming on his cheeks as he tried to hide the fact that he had indeed, just said that.</p>
<p>“Well then, if we're ‘romantic’ and all that jazz,” She could flirt too couldn’t she? “I think you can at least come over for dinner.”</p>
<p>“Fine. But I was planning to nap when I got off.” He looked a little annoyed at the prospect of having to miss his nap and she offered him a look. “It's been a long 36 hours.”</p>
<p>“I have a bed at my place too.” That had totally come out wrong. “No reason to nap alone.”</p>
<p>“Is that an invitation?” He raised an eyebrow as he offered her a quirky smile and she shook her head with a soft giggle.</p>
<p>“Yes, an invitation to nap and nothing more.” She was fine with sharing a bed with him, as long as he stayed clothed.</p>
<p>“Nothing more?” He almost looked, disappointed, and she was uncertain as to why that bothered her so much.</p>
<p>“Don't push your luck.” Despite his whatever it was with Zoe, she honestly didn’t strike him as the kind of man to try and go any further than what she laid out on the line.</p>
<p>“Maybe I'll push it just a tad…” He inched his way toward her and she wondered if he was going to try and kiss her.</p>
<p>But there were an awful lot of people moving around the station and she doubted he was that bold.</p>
<p>“Goodbye Captain Strand.” She reached a hand out and gently patted his arm, a smile forming on her face as she watched the blush creep back into his cheeks just a tad.</p>
<p>And then she turned on her heel and headed away from him.</p>
<p>“Goodbye Captain Blake!” She heard him shout after her and she let out a soft chuckle as she made her way inside the firehouse.</p>
<p>--</p>
<p>Michelle had been shocked at Owen’s reluctance to her dinner invitation earlier.</p>
<p>She had also been shocked when he quickly changed his tune.</p>
<p>And then he had been back to his normal flirty self, agreeing to dinner and possibly even a nap.</p>
<p>And nothing more.</p>
<p>She had meant that part.</p>
<p>Definitely that part.</p>
<p>Her doorbell ringing startled her from her thoughts and she glanced at the clock on her stove.</p>
<p>2:10pm stared back at her and she wondered if it was actually going to be him.</p>
<p>When she opened her door her question was answered because standing before her was none other than Owen Strand and if she was telling the honest to God truth he looked dreamier than ever.</p>
<p>“Hi.” She whispered her greeting as she took in the sight of him in an Austin FD t-shirt and jogging pants and damn was he doing things to her heart, and let's be real here, other parts of her body were reacting in kind.</p>
<p>“Hi.” He offered her a smile as he let his eyes lock with hers and she knew she had just been busted checking him out.</p>
<p>She felt the blush creep from her neck to her cheeks and all the way to her ears.</p>
<p>“You came?” She coughed out her question and he chuckled softly as she backed up, letting him cross the threshold into her place.</p>
<p>“Well you promised me a nap and a home cooked meal, so…” She guessed that was as good a reason as any.</p>
<p>“It's not my charming personality that won you over?” She kind of hoped that he just wanted to see her.</p>
<p>“Eh… that was part of it…” He shrugged his shoulders with a smile and she slapped his shoulder playfully as she shut the door behind him.</p>
<p>“Bedroom’s this way…” She felt odd saying such a line to him.</p>
<p>It’s not like he was there for a booty call.</p>
<p>It’s not like he was there for anything at all really.</p>
<p>“I remember.” His reply was soft and he almost looked nervous.</p>
<p>“Right, you've been here before.” She clapped her hands together and headed toward the room down the hall.</p>
<p>“It wasn't that long ago.” She could hear him walking softly behind her and he must have ditched his tennis shoes at the door at some point.</p>
<p>“It's been a long week okay, leave me be.” He chuckled as he stopped in the doorway and she tilted her head to the side and offered him a soft smile.</p>
<p>“I‘ll be right out.” She pointed toward the bathroom door before turning back to face him. “Get comfy.”</p>
<p>But he didn’t get comfy and when she walked out of the bathroom a minute later he was just standing there staring at the bed.</p>
<p>“This is awkward.” He whispered, his eyes shifting toward her as she crawled into bed.</p>
<p>“Oh hush.” She tossed the blankets back and patted the pillow beside hers. “Lay down. Relax.”</p>
<p>He stared at her for a second before finally giving in and the next thing she knew he was settling against the pillow with a sigh, his eyes closing almost instantly as she pulled the blankets up over them both.</p>
<p>“Rest Owen.” She reached over and patted his cheek, his eyes opening briefly as he stared back at her. “It's just a nap.”</p>
<p>“Just a nap…” He nodded his head before closing his eyes once more, quiet snores leaving his mouth within minutes.</p>
<p>Part of her wanted nothing more than to curl up beside him and hold him close.</p>
<p>Part of her wanted to tangle her legs with his and get lost in his arms.</p>
<p>But she knew that was crossing a line they had silently drawn and she didn’t want to mess things up.</p>
<p>So instead she settled on her side so that she could watch him sleep.</p>
<p>And before long her body gave in as well and her eyes closed just as his hand wrapped gently around hers under the covers.</p>
<p>She didn’t know if he was doing it consciously or not, but either way, it made her heart flutter in her chest as she drifted off to sleep.</p>
<p>--</p>
<p>She woke up a little before 5:00pm and reluctantly released Owen’s hand before crawling out of bed and making her way toward the bathroom.</p>
<p>After freshening up some she headed toward the kitchen and started dinner.</p>
<p>She knew she should probably wake him soon but she figured he deserved as much sleep as possible so she figured she would wait until dinner was almost done.</p>
<p>She had been halfway through the process when she heard soft footsteps down the hall and then he appeared to her left with a soft huff.</p>
<p>When she turned to face him she let out a gentle sigh at how rough he looked, the dark circles under his eyes, the paleness of his cheeks, the slight slouch to his torso.</p>
<p>She could instantly tell he wasn’t feeling well and she hated that he was having to go through this.</p>
<p>“You okay?” She knew what his answer would be but she still asked it.</p>
<p>“Yeah.” Right on the money with that one.</p>
<p>“Bullshit.” She dried her hands off and tossed the towel onto the counter before heading toward him. “What's wrong?”</p>
<p>“I woke up with this headache.” He shook his head as he blinked a few times and she couldn’t stop herself from reaching out and cupping his cheek. “It's just… it's pretty bad.”</p>
<p>“Well go sit down then.” She gestured toward the couch with her free hand but when his head tilted slightly against her palm she couldn’t help but let her thumb brush across the slight stubble on his cheek. “Did you take anything?”</p>
<p>“No.” He shook his head and closed his eyes and she could feel her heart tightening in her chest.</p>
<p>He truly was too strong for his own damn good sometimes.</p>
<p>“Owen, sit.” She gently let her hand fall before turning him toward the couch.</p>
<p>He let her guide him without any resistance and once he was seated she knelt down in front of him and took his hands in hers.</p>
<p>“What do you need?” She hoped that he wouldn’t be stubborn and that he’d let her help.</p>
<p>“Nothing. I'm okay. I just… I need a minute.” But she should have known better.</p>
<p>“I’m gonna get you some Tylenol okay?” He nodded his head softly as she rose to stand, her hands dropping his before making her way into the kitchen.</p>
<p>She returned a second later with a cold bottle of water and two pills, returning to her kneeling position in front of him as she held her hand out.</p>
<p>“Take these.” She kept her voice low and watched as he eyed her suspiciously before taking the pills and the water.</p>
<p>He downed them within seconds and she watched as he titled his head back and closed his eyes.</p>
<p>She felt horrible that she had dragged him out of his house when he was feeling this bad.</p>
<p>Maybe next time she’d suggest they just hang out there.</p>
<p>“I'm good.” He whispered, his head lifting as he eyed her softly.</p>
<p>“You sure?” She had her doubts but she also didn’t want to push him too much.</p>
<p>“It still hurts, but I'm okay.” He nodded his head softly as he offered her a half smile. “I'm probably just hungry too. I haven't eaten much.”</p>
<p>“You need to eat Owen.” She couldn’t believe he wasn’t eating.</p>
<p>She was pretty sure his doctor had already fussed at him about that once before.</p>
<p>“You sound like TK.” He didn’t sound to happy to know that he was being ganged up on but it was for his own good.</p>
<p>“Well that's because we're both smart people and we're worried about you.” She squeezed his hand gently as she spoke and his eyes softened at her words. “You can't deprive yourself of food right now, as much as you may want too.”</p>
<p>“I know.” He sounded like he genuinely understood and that made her feel a tiny bit better.</p>
<p>“Okay then. Well I'm gonna go finish dinner.” She pushed herself into a standing position before grabbing the TV remote off the table and handing it to him. “You can turn the TV on if you want. Carlos said I should get some baseball channel, I wrote the number down.”</p>
<p>In fact, Carlos had argued with her for two hours the other night over whether or not she got a baseball channel and why she should already know of its existence.</p>
<p>When she tried to dodge his question of why she was all of a sudden worried about it he had stared her down until she gave in.</p>
<p>Luckily he hadn’t asked who the guy was and was only concerned with her being safe and watching her back.</p>
<p>“Thanks.” He smiled up at her and she smiled back before heading back toward the kitchen.</p>
<p>She finished dinner up while half listening to the sound of some baseball game he had managed to find and when everything was said and done she went to get his attention.</p>
<p>But he looked so relaxed and calm and in his element that she didn’t really want to disturb him just yet.</p>
<p>So instead she stopped behind the couch and let her hand fall to his head, her fingers threading through his hair softly as she watched him close his eyes.</p>
<p>“Dinner ready?” She was shocked to hear him ask the question because she could have sworn that her head rub had put him to sleep.</p>
<p>But then she remembered how hungry he said he was earlier and she figured that he had been holding out for that.</p>
<p>“Yeah.” She let her hand stop it’s massaging and stood back up, watching as he pushed himself into a standing position and stretching slightly. “I didn't pour you anything to drink because I didn't know what you'd be in the mood for, but everything else is done.”</p>
<p>“Smells good and I’ll just keep my water if you don't mind.” He headed toward the kitchen then, his movements still slow and slightly sluggish from his nap earlier.</p>
<p>“That's fine. I hope you don't mind lasagna?” She hadn’t really known what to cook but this seemed to be the only recipe she ever got right. “I know you're all healthy eating and what not…”</p>
<p>“Lasagna is fine.” The smile on his face said that lasagna was more than fine and she wondered how long he had been denying himself more than just protein shakes and turkey burgers. “And I'm trying to not be such a nut about my eating habits. The doctor made a point to tell me that I need to eat ‘well rounded’ meals.”</p>
<p>She figured that he had finally gotten fussed at about that.</p>
<p>“Well I put mushrooms and peppers in the sauce.” She normally kept those things out and opted for just jarred sauce instead, but this was for Owen and he deserved better than that. “And I used turkey, not ground beef! I read that's healthier!”</p>
<p>“You made healthy lasagna for me?” His eyes were wide and the smirk he was giving her told her that he was not only impressed, but probably slightly turned on.</p>
<p>“Yes. Yes I did.” She had been quite proud of herself actually.</p>
<p>She may have lived her single life on pizza and Chinese take out.</p>
<p>But Owen was part of her ‘not so single life’ and he deserved a home cooked meal.</p>
<p>“You know you're gonna win me over if you keep this up right?” That hadn’t really been her plan in the beginning but now she was starting to like the idea of it all. “First there were head rubs and naps. Then you find baseball on TV and make me healthy lasagna. What's next?”</p>
<p>“Well I don't do booty calls so you're out of luck there.” She pointed at him with a spoon as she spoke and she instantly felt like an idiot.</p>
<p>She didn’t need to bring that up to him.</p>
<p>That was none of his business right now.</p>
<p>“Not where I was going with this but alright…” And clearly he wasn’t asking about that either.</p>
<p>She felt the blush return to her neck and she let out a sigh as she turned away from him to fix his plate.</p>
<p>“I'm just putting that out there.” She couldn’t believe she had said something so stupid to him. “I know you and whats-her-face were, well, you know?”</p>
<p>“Yeah…” His reply wasn’t what she expected and she turned back around to see him standing with his hands in his pockets and a curious look on his face.</p>
<p>“You're not still doing that are you?” Not that it was any of her business.</p>
<p>“No. I've uh… been giving her the cold shoulder lately.” But hearing that bit of good news did wonders for her heart.</p>
<p>“Oh okay.” She turned back around and tried to hide her giddy smile.</p>
<p>But she knew he was onto her the second he started walking toward her.</p>
<p>“Why are you so bothered by it?” He stopped next to her at the counter and she let out a sigh.</p>
<p>“Not bothered. Just concerned.” She shook her head as she plated more lasagna and she tried to hide the smile that was threatening to come forward.</p>
<p>She didn’t know if it was his close proximity to her or what, but something about this situation was making her all tingly inside.</p>
<p>“Concerned? Why?” Again, she knew it was none of her business.</p>
<p>“Didn't want you doing something stupid.” But he was her friend if nothing else and she didn’t want to see him get hurt.</p>
<p>Or get in trouble.</p>
<p>“Uh huh. You sure you weren't jealous?” He reached out then and took the spoon from her hand before placing it on the counter and spinning her around.</p>
<p>He had her trapped now, his hands settling against her hips as he stared her down and she swallowed.</p>
<p>She had imagined this scenario with him multiple times.</p>
<p>But she never once thought that she’d actually be in it with him.</p>
<p>“Not jealous.” She blinked her eyes a few times before lifting her head and locking her eyes with his. “But… I will say, I don't share very well.”</p>
<p>“No worries there. No sharing happening.” He whispered his words with a slight growl to them and she raised an eyebrow as she let her hands fall to his chest.</p>
<p>“I could take that to mean one of two things.” She didn’t know if that meant that she didn’t have to share because he wasn’t interested in her.</p>
<p>Or if she didn’t have to share because he wasn’t interested in the bimbo.</p>
<p>Either way, she felt her heart doing some funky things in her chest and she didn’t like it.</p>
<p>“Well don't.” He growled out, his fingers sliding under the material of her t-shirt as he stared her down. “It means exactly what you think it means.”</p>
<p>“You're not hers?” She whispered her question as she drummed her fingers against his t-shirt.</p>
<p>“I never was.” He whispered back.</p>
<p>“Well I mean… you did kinda blow me off for her that night.” She had tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal, but it had been a big deal to her, a really big deal in fact.</p>
<p>“All you had to say was that you wanted me to stay.” He dropped his forehead to hers and she took a deep breath as she closed her eyes.</p>
<p>“Well, fine.” She reopened them and offered him a soft smile with her words. “I'm saying it now then. I want you to stay.”</p>
<p>“Like, the night? Because that's starting to look a little like we're ‘romantic’.” He was joking with her and she both loved it and hated it.</p>
<p>“A few hours? The night? Who cares.” She shrugged her shoulders as she moved her hands to his hair, tangling her fingers in the locks at his neckline. “Just… don't go back to her.”</p>
<p>“Okay then.” He whispered with a soft smile.</p>
<p>“Okay then.” And then she was dragging his lips down to hers and kissing him with a fire she didn’t know she possessed.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*Please comment!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*So I wrote this before any information about TK’s mother was revealed so that storyline DOES NOT follow canon. <br/>**There’s also mention to TK/Carlos’ developing whatever it is.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Owen had been shocked when Michelle had initiated their little make out session against the counter earlier.</p>
<p>That certainly hadn’t been where he had been going with that whole conversation.</p>
<p>But once her lips were on his he couldn’t stop himself and that had been the end of that.</p>
<p>He hadn’t let it go to far though, no more than a few minutes, because he knew that he wouldn’t be able to control himself if he got farther than that.</p>
<p>She had whimpered when he had pulled away but then his stomach had growled and she was laughing at him and that had been enough to convince him to walk away.</p>
<p>After dinner she had dumped the dishes in the sink and muttered something about cleaning them later.</p>
<p>And then she collapsed on the couch and patted the space beside her.</p>
<p>He had wanted to say ‘no’.</p>
<p>He had wanted to tell her that he should probably leave.</p>
<p>But she looked so soft and inviting and he hadn’t been able to turn her down after she gave him that shy smile.</p>
<p>So instead he had made himself cozy against the arm of the couch and when she had tucked herself against his side he had done everything he could to contain the smile on his face.</p>
<p>She had been sitting there holding his hands, her fingers absentmindedly tracing over his palms and running along his wrist, when she finally broke the comfortable silence. </p>
<p>“You never did tell me what you're business with Billy was about.” He was shocked that she hadn’t heard the rumors around the station about what he had been up too.</p>
<p>Or what he had almost done in order to shut Billy up.</p>
<p>“Same thing as before. He wanted my job.” He had tried to play nice, and even though he had mentioned something about being friends with the man, he was definitely keeping one eye open when he was around.</p>
<p>“He never gave a damn about the 126 before.” She let her head fall back so that she could look up at him, her eyes curious and almost angry looking. “Even before he took time off.”</p>
<p>“Well he wanted it back for whatever reason.” He guessed that pride had something to do with it. “Seemed pretty hell bent on taking me down in order to get it too.”</p>
<p>“He's always played dirty. It was always one his least desirable traits.” She rolled her eyes before letting her head fall back against his shoulder.</p>
<p>“What the hell did you ever see in him anyway? He's a prick.” He had never gotten any details on their relationship and he was curious.</p>
<p>Michelle was so soft and kind and laid back.</p>
<p>Billy was loud and mean and over the top.</p>
<p>He couldn’t imagine how that relationship had ever worked.</p>
<p>“It was a while ago. Before he got sick and the 126 went down.” She didn’t sound like she wanted to talk about it and he felt bad. “He was an asshole, but he had soft spot for me.”</p>
<p>“Well he better not find out we’re friendly.” He prayed that Billy never got wind of their ‘whatever it was’ because he knew the man would try to take them both down. “I'm pretty sure he'll find a way to destroy me with that too.”</p>
<p>Not that there were any rules against them being together.</p>
<p>In fact, he was kind of surprised by that.</p>
<p>But then again, as he knew from experience, it was often only the people you worked with in that field that understood your lifestyle.</p>
<p>Maybe that’s why Judd and Grace seemed to work out so well.</p>
<p>“What I do on my own time is none of his business and he knows that.” She growled out her words and he gently squeezed her hand.</p>
<p>“You said that he was the one that got left in the dust.” She turned her eyes back up to him and blinked like an innocent child who had no idea what he was talking about. “What did you do to him?”</p>
<p>But he suspected that she knew exactly what he was talking about and she knew exactly what she had done to him.</p>
<p>Not that he didn’t deserve it Owen was sure.</p>
<p>“I wouldn't put up with his shit anymore.” She pushed herself up onto her knees beside him, her hand dropping his before picking it right back up. “His soft spot for me started to wear when he got sick and from there it just escalated. I wouldn't let him walk all over me and do whatever he wanted to me.”</p>
<p>“Was he physical? Did he hurt you?” He would murder the man in cold blood if he ever found out that he had laid his hands on this woman.</p>
<p>“He tried. Once.” He could feel his heart starting to race just as the thought of it. “He never tried again after I broke his hand.”</p>
<p>“And that was the end of it?” Thank God she stood up for herself and didn’t need anyone to save her.</p>
<p>That was definitely one of her traits that he liked the most.</p>
<p>“Yeah. His pride was hurt more than anything.” He couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “I walked into the house the next day like nothing happened, like I'd never met him before. The team noticed. He didn't take to kindly to being shafted and everyone knowing it.”</p>
<p>“Well damn.” He let out a low whistle and she smiled at him softly. “Remind me to never break your heart.”</p>
<p>“Well my best friend is a cop, so…” He was thankful that her and Carlos seemed to have such a close friendship.</p>
<p>He figured that she probably didn’t get out much.</p>
<p>“Speaking of which…” He really shouldn’t be nosy but he couldn’t help himself.</p>
<p>“Carlos? What about him?” She raised an eyebrow as she sat back on her heels, her head tilting to the side a little.</p>
<p>“He a good kid?” He figured he was, what with being a cop and all, but he had known plenty of dirty cops in his time and he prayed that Carlos wasn’t one of them.</p>
<p>“He's the best. We've been through some shit, but he's always had my back.” She smiled as she spoke and he got the impression that she was being genuine. “He's helped me with Iris’ case when every other cop ignored me.”</p>
<p>“Good to know.” He really shouldn’t be ‘that father’, especially not when his son was 26 and perfectly capable of looking out for herself.</p>
<p>But he had suffered enough and been through enough heartbreak and Owen couldn’t bear to see it happen again.</p>
<p>“Is this about TK?” His eyes got wide at her question and he wondered how she knew about the pair.</p>
<p>“Yeah. I just… I worry about him.” He figured she probably just caught on though, she was trained to be observant and all.</p>
<p>“Carlos won't hurt him.” She squeezed his hand and he suddenly felt a hundred times better. “He's pretty smitten with him.”</p>
<p>“TK’s pretty smitten too.” He had yet to actually get the kid to tell him anything about his relationship with the cop, but he wasn’t stupid and he wasn’t blind and he damn well knew there was something going on there.</p>
<p>“So I've noticed.” She must have been seeing the same things he had.</p>
<p>“He's a good kid, really.” And TK was a good kid.</p>
<p>Sure he had messed up and made some shitty life choices, but hadn’t they all at some point?</p>
<p>Hell, at least he wasn’t twice divorced and living with his grown son.</p>
<p>“I know. I can see that.” Her eyes twinkled with her words and he wondered where she was going with this. “He's a lot like his father it seems.”</p>
<p>“Hush. I hope he doesn't turn out anything like me.” He let his head fall back against the couch with a sigh.</p>
<p>He wanted TK to do better than he had with life.</p>
<p>Sure he had a great kid and a good firehouse and he was making wonderful friends.</p>
<p>But there was so much more that he could’ve done.</p>
<p>“I think it's a little late for that.” She poked his side and he turned to face her.</p>
<p>“Don't say that.” He whispered, his eyes closing briefly at the thought.</p>
<p>“You're a good man Owen Strand, so hush.” She reached out then and patted his cheek and he couldn’t help but let his head lean into her touch.</p>
<p>“You don't know anything about me.” He stared back at her and she let out a sigh before making a move he certainly wasn’t expecting.</p>
<p>“I know you're strong and smart and that you have a big heart.” Her voice was soft as she moved to straddle his lap, her hands going to rest on his chest as she stared him down. “No one else would've come to the 126 and done what you did. No one would've given these people a chance.”</p>
<p>“I simply did the right thing. Nothing more, nothing less.” He shook his head back and forth as he tried to get her to see that what he did didn’t make him a good person, it simply made him the right person.</p>
<p>“You're not a bad person, not by a long shot.” She poked his nose as she tried to get his attention and he sighed before lifting himself back up, his eyes locking with hers once more. “And look at that boy of yours, he's wonderful. Everything you did for him, that says a lot.”</p>
<p>“It's not like I had a choice. I couldn't give up on him.” He would never walk away from him, ever. “He deserved better than that.”</p>
<p>“Where’s his mother been through all of this?” He had been praying that she’d never ask, that she’d never want to know about his marriages.</p>
<p>But then again, he guessed it was only fair since he asked about Billy and everything.</p>
<p>“She’s still in New York. Working. That’s where she always is.” Sarah had been married to her job from day one and it had cost her more than it had cost him in the long run.</p>
<p>Three marriages compared to his two, two kids compared to his one, and more money than he could fathom in lawyers and courts and custody hearings.</p>
<p>At least he had gotten lucky and she had just given up when it came to TK.</p>
<p>Her daughter hadn’t been so lucky.</p>
<p>“I take it that’s why you two separated?” The softness in her eyes made him feel like he could actually talk to her, like he could trust her, a feeling he had never gotten from either of his wives.</p>
<p>“She hated my hours, I hated hers more.” It hadn’t been too bad at first, otherwise he wouldn’t have married her. “I may have worked a lot, but I did get days off, and any days off I had, I spent them with TK. She never made time for him, or for us for that matter.”</p>
<p>“It must have been hard…” He had been more concerned for TK’s wellbeing than his.</p>
<p>He understood why she was never around.</p>
<p>But a little boy in a baseball uniform didn’t.</p>
<p>“Not really. I mean, by the time the divorce was final I had long since fallen out of love.” In fact, he suspected he had fallen out of love around TK’s fifth birthday when she had refused to throw him a party because she didn’t want to plan it.</p>
<p>Or to pay for it.</p>
<p>Or to have to pretend like she cared about his friends and their annoying rich parents.</p>
<p>“And TK?” The concern in her words made his heart fluttered.</p>
<p>How did this woman seem to have more love for his son than his mother ever had?</p>
<p>“He was twelve. He was old enough to understand.” By the time they had signed the papers he had practically been begging for her to get lost. “He stayed with me because it just made more sense. It was hard, but we made it work.”</p>
<p>“Was his mom ever involved?” He hated that he had to say ‘no’.</p>
<p>“She’d see him on weekends. She’d come to his baseball games sometimes, various school events, but she never made time for just him.” He hadn’t wanted things to be that way.</p>
<p>He had wanted to co-parent.</p>
<p>He had wanted her to care.</p>
<p>But he couldn’t force her to love her son just like he couldn’t force her to love him.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry to hear that.” She whispered, her hands moving to his shoulders slowly.</p>
<p>“It’s alright. It’s what was for the best.” He shrugged his shoulders and offered her the best smile he could manage. “They reconciled a while back. They talk at least once a week, but she still doesn’t really see him much.”</p>
<p>She nodded her head in response but didn’t reply and he was thankful.</p>
<p>His head was starting to hurt again and he just wanted to sleep.</p>
<p>He let his head fall back against the couch cushion, his eyes closing as he tried to relax and not freak out about the discomfort he was in.</p>
<p>He had always been strong, always, and normally a headache wouldn’t even make him flinch.</p>
<p>But these damn chemo headaches were going to kill him long before the cancer did.</p>
<p>The next thing he knew her hands were in his hair and she was rubbing his scalp softly.</p>
<p>“Head still hurt?” Her question was whispered and he guessed that maybe she knew that loud sounds weren’t his friend right now.</p>
<p>“Yeah a little.” A little was an understatement but he didn’t want her to worry.</p>
<p>“I made brownies,” He lifted his head at the word and she smiled back at him softly, “but we can save them for breakfast if you want.”</p>
<p>“A brownie would be good actually.” In fact, a little sugar might actually do the trick.</p>
<p>“I'll go get one now.” She gently moved from his lap onto the couch and then pushed herself into a standing position. “Want any ice cream? I've got vanilla and strawberry.”</p>
<p>“No, just the brownie. But thanks.” He certainly didn’t need a sugar overload though.</p>
<p>“Okay. One brownie coming up!” And then she was making her way toward the kitchen with a little pep in her step and he couldn’t help but chuckle.</p>
<p>The next thing he knew she was patting his thigh and when he opened his eyes up she was standing before him with a napkin in her hand.</p>
<p>“Dessert has arrived.” She smiled down at him and he swallowed.</p>
<p>She had to be the most inviting sight he had ever seen.</p>
<p>“You or the brownie?” He figured he would ask just to be sure.</p>
<p>“The brownie!” She slapped his shoulder playfully before plopping down next to him, her eyes rolling as she shoved the napkin in his direction.</p>
<p>“It was worth a shot.” He offered her a wink and she shook her head, a small smile forming on her lips as she turned her head away from him.</p>
<p>He figured he had probably made her a little nervous and he couldn’t help but chuckle.</p>
<p>At least they had the flirting part down if nothing else.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*Don’t forget to comment :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*Last chapter of this part, but there's more to come! <br/>**I imagine Michelle is not a jump them and leave them kinda girl, so her hesitation is stemming from that.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After they had enjoyed their dessert Michelle had been shocked when Owen had simply tucked her back against his side and returned his attention to the baseball game on TV.</p>
<p>She was certain he would try to make up another excuse to leave.</p>
<p>But instead he seemed to make himself comfortable once again and she felt her heart start to race in her chest.</p>
<p>Hopefully this was a sign that he was catching on to her wanting him around.</p>
<p>About twenty minutes into the new game she looked up and saw that he had his eyes closed, his head tilted to the side as he tried to sleep.</p>
<p>Reaching out toward him she let her fingers trail over his cheek before cupping his chin and turning his attention toward her.</p>
<p>“Let's get you to bed.” She whispered, her eyes softening at the exhausted look on his face. “You're clearly exhausted.”</p>
<p>“Inviting me to bed? Well, well, well…” He waggled his eyebrows at her and she simply chuckled before patting his cheek softly.</p>
<p>“Nice try Captain Strand,” She pushed herself to stand as she spoke, “but there's nothing happening in that bed tonight but some cuddling.”</p>
<p>“Not even a kiss?” He looked kind of disappointed at that thought and she watched as he tried his best to pout.</p>
<p>“Maybe, if you behave yourself.” She winked at him as she reached out to take his hand, hoping that she could get him to stand without too much effort.</p>
<p>“Why are you so opposed to having sex with me?” She was shocked by his question and she felt a knot start to form in her stomach.</p>
<p>She certainly didn’t think they needed to discuss this already did they?</p>
<p>“I'm not.” She whispered as she tried to swallow away the knot that was now forming in her throat.</p>
<p>“So what then?” She let out a sigh as she turned away from him but he pulled himself up to stand beside her and when his hands settled on her hips she couldn’t help but face him.</p>
<p>“It's not really my thing.” That was a lie and she knew it.</p>
<p>“Sex? Sex is everybody's thing at some point or another with someone or the other.” She knew that.</p>
<p>“I enjoy sex plenty thank you.” And she did, she just wasn’t there yet with him.</p>
<p>“So it's me then?” She hated that he thought that.</p>
<p>And it made her feel a little restless that he seemed to associate having sex with her with her liking him.</p>
<p>She hadn’t gotten that impression from him before now.</p>
<p>“No. It's most definitely you.” And it wasn’t him, not at all, because if there was one thing that had plagued her mind the past few weeks, it had been him. “I would… ahem… I'm sure I would rather enjoy sex with you.”</p>
<p>“So…” He didn’t seem upset at her words though and she was becoming more and more confused.</p>
<p>“Look, I'm not a hookup kinda girl. It's just, not my thing.” It hadn’t ever really been her thing to be honest and she most certainly didn’t want to start with him.</p>
<p>“Ah.” He nodded his head in what she guessed was an understanding gesture.</p>
<p>“I take it that's more your style?” She prayed it wasn’t because she really wanted this to go somewhere.</p>
<p>“Not necessarily. I kinda just let my heart and mind decide. Sometimes my body takes over…” She guessed that made sense.</p>
<p>“Like with Barbie?” She hated bringing that woman up but she wanted to know if he had felt anything there.</p>
<p>“With Zoe… yes. But that was… I don't know what that was.” She guessed that already. “But it wasn't emotional. It was purely physical.”</p>
<p>Thank God.</p>
<p>“But with me…?” She hoped it was different.</p>
<p>She hoped that he wasn’t just trying to get her in bed.</p>
<p>“Well I like you so…” That seemed to be more than he had felt for what’s her face so she guessed that was a step in the right direction.</p>
<p>“That's a start.” She whispered her words out like she was uncertain of them.</p>
<p>He reached up and cupped her cheek softly, his eyes locking with hers as he tried to get her to understand whatever emotion it was that was plaguing his eyes.</p>
<p>“So I guess we’re just…” She wondered if he even knew what that emotion was.</p>
<p>“Getting there.” She let her hands run down his chest slowly, praying that he couldn’t tell how badly they were shaking in that moment. “Right now, I'm not at that point. And I don't think you are either.”</p>
<p>“Oh I could definitely be at that point.” She figured as much. “But I don't wanna risk it, so I'll behave myself for now.”</p>
<p>She was thankful that he was willing to wait, at least for now.</p>
<p>“You owe me a few dates and everything before we get there.” She watched his face to see what his response to that would be and he simply smiled back at her, his fingers stroking over her hip bones softly.</p>
<p>“I can do that.” He whispered, his forehead falling to hers as his eyes closed softly.</p>
<p>“Good. Now, let's get you to bed.” It sounded so odd to say that to him when she knew they wouldn’t be doing anything. “I want you to sleep.”</p>
<p>“Hmmm.” She wondered if he was going to try and get out of staying again.</p>
<p>“I'll rub your head again…” But she knew just how to get him.</p>
<p>“You know the way to my heart.” He offered her a soft smile before pulling back, gesturing for her to lead the way.</p>
<p>So she took his hand softly in hers and made her way toward her bedroom, him trailing behind her quietly.</p>
<p>--</p>
<p>They had settled in bed after they each took their time in the bathroom and Owen had immediately flopped onto his stomach, his eyes closing as she pulled the blankets up over them both.</p>
<p>She had let her hand settle on his head then, her fingers tangling in the soft locks as she began to massage his scalp, a smile forming on his lips as he began to relax.</p>
<p>After a few minutes he had started to fade off and she let her hand fall to his neck, her fingers stilling their movements only for a few seconds before they began playing with the pieces of hair at the nape of his neck.</p>
<p>“You know, I never let anyone touch my hair. Ever.” He cracked an eye open and she raised an eyebrow.</p>
<p>“No one?” She found that incredibly hard to believe.</p>
<p>“No one.” He whispered.</p>
<p>“Not even your wife?” She couldn’t imagine that he stayed married to a woman for almost a decade and never let her touch his hair.</p>
<p>“When we first started dating Sarah liked it. It was a little longer then. Ya know, the 70s?” She couldn’t imagine him with longer hair, nope, never. “But she never paid much attention to it after a while.”</p>
<p>“Hmm… I can't imagine you with more hair.” She liked his hair just the way it was. “Although I bet you looked devilishly handsome.”</p>
<p>He rolled his eyes when she winked at him and she couldn’t help but chuckle.</p>
<p>“It hasn't been long in years. I grew it some when I was out of work, after the Towers fell, but it didn't feel right so I cut it as soon as I was back on the job.” She could hear the softness in his voice when he talked about his time off and she let her thumb brush against his cheek softly.</p>
<p>“Well I like it. I think it's perfect just the way it is.” He shook his head and let out a sigh.</p>
<p>“What if I go bald? Would you still like me then?” She knew that he was afraid of losing his hair but she hoped that he realized that it was a superficial thing and that it was going to be okay even if it did happen.</p>
<p>“I think I'd like you no matter what.” She smiled at him and he swallowed, his eyes closing once more as he started to relax again. “But having a little hair to play with is nice too. And I can tell it's relaxing for you. You haven't opened your eyes in almost forty minutes.”</p>
<p>“I'm honestly amazed I'm not asleep yet.” She was too to be honest.</p>
<p>“Maybe I should stop talking.” She hadn’t meant to keep him up with her talking.</p>
<p>But she felt so comfortable with him that she couldn’t help herself.</p>
<p>She had never really had anyone to talk to about mundane things before.</p>
<p>“You don't have too. I like hearing your voice.” He rolled onto his side then, his eyes opening as her hand fell to rest on the bed between them.</p>
<p>“Oh hush.” She shook her head at him as she swatted at his hands.</p>
<p>“True story. It's comforting.” He tried once more to pull her close and she let out a growl.</p>
<p>“Well I'm glad. But I really think you should probably get some sleep.” She moved to try and slide away from him, something inside of her getting all anxious and knotted up.</p>
<p>She hated this feeling and she honestly didn’t know where it came from.</p>
<p>“Michelle?” He took a hold of her hand softly, his body staying put this time as he stopped trying to get her closer. “What’s wrong?”</p>
<p>“Nothing.” She shook her head again and closed her eyes. “I don’t know.”</p>
<p>“Well relax.” He squeezed her hand then and she reopened her eyes and stared back at him. “Just sleep. Nothing more.”</p>
<p>She didn’t know why she felt like she was obligated to be close to him.</p>
<p>Just because they were actually sharing a bed didn’t mean they had to share the space did it?</p>
<p>“Goodnight.” She whispered out the word as she rolled onto her other side, her eyes closing as she fought off what felt like a panic attack.</p>
<p>A panic attack that literally came out of nowhere for absolutely no good reason.</p>
<p>She expected him to get mad or to try and pull her close again but instead he pushed himself up, leaned down and pressed a kiss against her cheek, and then settled back on his side of the bed with a soft sigh.</p>
<p>“Goodnight.” He whispered into the darkness of the room and she felt her heart settle down just a little bit.</p>
<p>She was comforted in knowing that he wasn’t going to push her into anything.</p>
<p>That was definitely a first for her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>*I hope you guys enjoyed this! I promise there will be more to come!<br/>**Don't forget to comment!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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